Paramore

Paramore's new album Riot! has been on high rotation all weekend.

Usually I'm not into "girl rock" or whatever you want to call it. But the songwriting is so fantastic that I can't put this cd down. The songs are just so damn catchy!

Hayley Williams (lead singer) and the rest of Paramore have such an "in your face" way of delivering the lyrics that you can't help but get all pumped up.

Don't know why I didn't find this band sooner. But I will definitely be checking out the rest of their stuff.

The Cubbies

There are a ridiculous number of people from Chicago here in the Phoenix metropolitan area. Do you think it could be a coincidence that all the older folks decide to spend their retirement in the city where the Chicago Cubs have their spring training? Mmm... probably not...

That's a picture of Mark Prior. And no, I wasn't stalking him or the rest of the team.

Er, much...

Photo: Sway Sovay

Montezuma Castle

Deciding it was absolutely necessary to take a break from unpacking all my belongings in the new apartment, I found myself in Rimrock, Arizona, this past weekend.

And I saw a castle there. Well, kind of.

Montezuma Castle is an enormous cliff dwelling built by the Sinagua over 400 years ago. What's really interesting to me is to look at what was going on in other parts of the world around the same time. For example:

-the British began settling North America
-Russia was descending into anarchy
-the Gregorian calendar (currently the most popular worldwide) was put into effect

The structure has between 45-50 rooms and was protected as a national monument by Theodore Roosevelt at the turn of the last century.

I wish the public were still allowed to walk through the castle and explore the rooms, but the government was forced to restrict access in the 1950s in order to preserve the structure's stability. Now the only people who get to experience the view from Montezuma Castle are park personnel.

As Napoleon Dynamite would say: Lucky.


Photos: Sway Sovay

Holiday Cactus

I've discovered that a lot of the plants that can be described as low maintenance and are still capable of surviving this oppressive Arizona heat are non-blooming succulents. Which presented me with an interesting task, since I really wanted some sort of flowering plants to liven up my new (but very bare) balcony.

I'll be honest, most varieties of cacti don't do it for me. I appreciate their place in the world, really I do, and I admire them for their hardiness, but to me they're just a little... boring...














Except for maybe the holiday cactus, also known as a Christmas cactus (among other names). I think their blooms are gorgeous, and they come in the most beautiful colors.

But for one reason or another, I have had the worst luck with these little guys.

I know a lot of people who have had great success with their holiday cactus plants, and they all say that the care level has been relatively low, but I don't know how this can be.

The thing about holiday cacti is that they have crazy specific requirements for light and temperature and water in order to bloom properly. So many hours a day of light, so many hours a day of darkness, a certain temperature above or below this or that, a certain schedule of watering, etc... It's sort of maddening.















Common sense would tell me to give up, but now it's almost become a game to me. I'm going to keep trying until I perfect the science of keeping one both alive and blooming, just you wait and and see.

At least I can say that because they're native to here, they tend to be fairly cheap. And I'll probably keep reminding myself of that fact each time I have to throw another one out.

Top Photo: Nayana Sondi
Bottom Photo: plantoftheweek.org

Harry Potter and A Series of Unfortunate Events

­I find it interesting that these children’s books have evolved into some sort of cultural phenomenon, despite the fact that they place such great emphasis on death and other dark subject matters.

I find it interesting, but not necessarily surprising.

These two series have something in common that can’t help but be fascinating to young readers the whole world over: the books open discussion to those matters which have been, by tradition, considered best to avoid in children’s literature.

What impresses me most about the Harry Potter series and the Unfortunate Events series is that their concepts were so radically original. I mean, how many people would have guessed that a book about three children who, after their parents die in a tragic house fire, have no choice but to make their way through tragedy after tragedy while losing relatives right and left, would have become such a huge success? The first book alone (of the thirteen total books) has sold somewhere around 20 million copies worldwide.

And Harry Potter? Sure, I can see a pitch for a story about a boy wizard going well. (I don’t know that I could have predicted 325-million-copies-worldwide well…) But no one who has read the books could possibly say that they don’t contain some incredibly dark undertones.

I think these series have done well because young readers are intrigued by subjects that they hadn’t seen much of until these books arrived. Lemony Snicket and J.K. Rowling have handed over content that’s maybe been considered somewhat forbidden in the recent years of children’s literature, but both authors have handled it in clever ways. They can bring the reader close to danger and death -- a lot closer than most other children’s authors who have made the bestsellers list -- but not too close, so that the magic and whimsy of the books remains intact. Snicket and Rowling also don’t “talk down” to their readers or spoonfeed them the details.

It’s refreshing to me to see children’s authors writing a larger vocabulary and allowing the readers to make inferences on their own. I hope this is a style that "sticks" and that other authors continue to improve upon it.

Tappity Tap Tap Tap

A word of advice to dance instructors everywhere:

When choreographing a piece that involves male dancers who are at the beginning of their foray into the magical world of dance, do not say anything along the lines of "...and now we're going to do a ball change..." without further explanation and actually expect the poor things to immediately understand what you're talking about.

Introverts Are People, Too

Thanks to The Atlantic, I now choose to see myself as "a minority in the regular population but a majority in the gifted population."

You're free to see me this way, too, of course.

Music Sites I Wouldn't Want To Live Without

Could I live without them? Yeah, probably. But I wouldn't want to.

If you're an audiohead, I hope you've already found these, but if you haven't...

Pandora: A kind of online radio station that you can customize to play only the music you like and music it suspects you'll like based upon your preferences. Super easy to use and a great way to discover bands you might have been missing out on.

Pollstar: This site lets you search for concerts by either artist, city or venue. One of my main thrills in life is good live music, so this is a required site for me.

And a true gem:

Live Plasma: A very cool page that will "map" your favorite artists/bands, movies, actors or directors, in order to show you what/who is similar in that same category. It's a bonus that the "mapping" uses really cool graphics.

I Love Them, I Just Don't Love Carrying Them Around In Boxes

So, as I've mentioned, I'm moving this weekend. And if you're a fellow writer/literary freak such as myself, or if you happen to know one personally, then you know that we hate moving because it forces us to go through the thousands and thousands of books and papers and magazines and notebooks and clippings we've hoarded since the last time we moved. Trend shows I normally put off this part of packing until it's much too late. Last year my friends and family had to start up a search party in order to find me a few days later, on the floor of my bedroom, buried under every piece of fiction and non-fiction I'd written between the years 2000 and 2006.

Of course it's understandable that I would hang on to most of the odds and ends I've written myself. But on top of that, I probably have hundreds of articles and short stories, poems, etc. that I did not write. And maybe I haven't even gone back and read them in years and years, but I still keep them. And what's more is, every time I'm forced pare the stack down to a file folder or two, I just can't seem to bring myself to throw them out.

Not sure what I'm saving them for. To share with friends, perhaps. Or maybe it's both inspiring and comforting to me to be surrounded by such great writing. Same situation with my shelves and shelves of books. I seldom re-read books, I just like having them there, at my fingertips. As the true bibliophiles will swear, the right books really can become like friends to you.

And yet, having said that, I can guarantee you I won't be talking so lovey-dovey about my journals and books come Saturday, after I've transported my umpteenth box of them halfway across town and up two flights of stairs.

The first words out of my mouth on Sunday will most likely be "back surgery."

Lisbon, Portugal

I was in Lisbon last month for a week. Wonderful city. I didn't experience any of the unfriendliness toward Americans that I have while visiting a few other countries. And I was surprised at how many people spoke English. Not just any English, though -- really really good English. I had zero problems being understood at virtually every establishment I visited.

Even the taxi drivers knew a lot of English, which was super convenient. No one likes to have to play charades with the cab driver in order to get to where he's going. And speaking of the cabs... Fare was incredibly cheap -- three to five Euros for practically everywhere I went! So much cheaper than cabs in the U.S., even taking the exchange rate into consideration.

Definitely did the "touristy" things while I was there. Castles, beaches, museums and the like.

My favorite activity was probably going to a professional soccer match between Portugal and Spain. I also enjoyed all the tiny shops in Cascais. Perfect little European seaside town, like something out of a quaint foreign film.

I think Portugal is probably pretty low on Americans' radar as far as vacations go, but I think that's going to change in the next several years. It was clear to me that the country and its capital are making a lot of changes to encourage potential tourists.

I'm kind of glad I saw the city when I did, before things become too commercialized, etc. Not having been born there, I'll never see the country the way the Portuguese see it, but at least this way I feel like I was able to get a little closer.

Ah, the travel bug. Exciting thing, isn't it? Once bitten, it becomes like a habit you just can't kick. And then suddenly everything you do revolves around getting your hands on more money in order to feed your habit.

I love traveling, because when I do, I discover so many things that I was missing out on. And what's more is, I didn't even know I was missing out on them! What a shame. And after having realized this, I just can't be content to leave unknown whatever else it is that I haven't discovered yet.

I just have to know what I'm missing, because it could be something absolutely wonderful.

This is why people start to wax a little philosophical when they travel. This is why people romantically sigh that they've "found themselves" while they've been on the road. It's because when we travel, we find that we become capable of seeing things we didn't know how to see before, and we find ourselves asking questions that we didn't know we may have been wondering all along.



Photos: Sway Sovay

Things That Made Me Laugh This Week

It's been a long week; however, there were highlights:

1.) The people at Dictionaraoke have used audio clips from online dictionaries to "sing the hits of yesterday and today." I've listened to almost all of them by now, and there are so many good ones I couldn't possibly choose a favorite. Go there, right now, and see what happens when karaoke and diction collide.

2.) Jessica Francis Kane's "Adverb Your Enthusiasm" currently found over at The Morning News is very clever indeed. I totally plan on using "Loch Nessily" in at least one sentence this weekend. Seriously.

3.) To be filed away under Things I've Overheard as I Left the Grocery Store: A thirty-something woman on her cell phone: "Well, if your dream isn't to move to Oklahoma and start a pickle farm, then we really need to talk!"

I find this particularly funny since I'm from Oklahoma. And no, I don't know anyone who owns or operates a pickle farm.

4.) Needs no introduction or wrap-up:

Things I Currently Covet

The entire Sarah Jessica Parker clothing collection.


I'm not a huge fan of Sarah Jessica Parker. A month or two ago, one of the girls in my office gushed, "Hey, did you hear that Sarah Jessica Parker is coming out with a new clothing line??"

To which I responded, "Oh really?? Cool." But to which I thought, "Who cares. All we need is yet another celebrity trying to capitalize on her fame by weedling her way into yet another industry." (Man, I am one cynical curmudgeon.)

But flash forward a few months and I found myself walking through a Steve and Barry's store with (and I am not ashamed to admit this) the sole purpose of checking out SJP's new line. (Which, by the way, is called Bitten.)

My conclusion? It's perfect. The whole collection is absolutely perfect. Every item under $20?And surprisingly good quality for that price? Have I died and gone to heaven?

It's amazing -- this woman has hit the nail exactly on the head. This is what girls and women all across the country have been praying for their whole lives: clothes that fit every shape and size, that won't make you break your budget, and that are classic enough to stay in style for years.

I don't know what SJP and Steve and Barry's have in mind for the seasonal collections to come, but I'm hoping that they don't let me down.

Photo: New York Times

The Rules of Moving

I'm getting ready to move apartments two weekends from now. And so, since the topic has been on my mind, I thought it might be an excellent time to review a few rules pertaining to what I like to refer to as "moving etiquette":

1.) If you asked people to help you move, and if they agreed, and if they did, in fact, help you move, then whether they are your friends or a guy you recruited off the street, the polite thing to do is to pay them back in some way.

Note: Your token of gratitude need not be huge, but it should probably reflect the amount of labor you required of them. Thus, if they have helped you move your one-bedroom apartment across the hall, you might want to treat them to ice cream. If, however, they have helped you move your three-bedroom townhome clear across the city, you should probably pay for dinner that evening. (Preferably after all of you have had the opportunity to shower.)

2.) Also, if you asked people to help you move, and if they agreed, and if they did, in fact, help you move, then whether they are your friends or a guy you recruited off the street, you have granted them the right to ask you to help them move the next time they need it.

3.) ALSO, if you asked people to help you move, and if they agreed, and if they did, in fact, help you move, AND if they did, in fact, exercise their right to ask you to help them move, then it is very bad form for you to decline. Very bad form indeed.

I've numbered this list for the sake of convenience, however, I think most of us will agree that the first and foremost rule of moving has always been, and always will be: Get your crap as quickly as possible from point A to point B in whatever way you possibly can. Am I right or am I right?

O-O-Oprah? O-Oh please.

Has everyone gotten over it by now, or are there others like me who are still asking:

"Why does Oprah have to be on every single cover?!?"

Not that I don't have a deep appreciation for all the money she donates to charity each year, or all the cash and prizes she gives away to her audience members. It's just that I feel like she's sending mixed signals here. The magazine cover situation seems a little self-absorbed if you ask me.

How can this woman perpetually claim to be all about boosting the self-images of men and women everywhere and yet never showcase anyone but herself on the cover of her magazine? Wouldn't a woman who spends so much time and effort supporting racial and cultural differences, etc., choose to use it as a medium for promoting the causes and interests of other worthy individuals?

If you've been asking yourself these same questions, I have good news for you. In an interview published in Essence magazine (Oct. 2003), Miss Oprah said, "When I first started the magazine, people were always saying, 'Well, who else are you going to put on the cover?' And I'd say, 'Well, who's going sell better than I am? You got any ideas?'"

Hm. Good point, Oprah. There's probably no one else on the planet besides you who can promote positive thinking and high self-esteem. Man, what were we thinking?

We Actually Know We're Neurotic

Women are neurotic. We are, it’s true, and I can admit this.

And while I’m at it, I’ll go ahead and say this, too: I feel bad for all the decent men, those rare and decent men, who actually have their acts together and who are forced to deal with neurotic behavior they don’t deserve.

I think that as women get older, the intelligent ones – the ones capable of learning from their past mistakes – are able to look back at the women who are some steps behind them and recognize: Oh dear god. I used to be that girl.

I no longer consider myself a novice in the dating and relationship arenas, but by no means would I ever call myself an expert – I’m a long ways from that. And yet, I still feel like it would be fair to say that I’ve gained some useful insights over the past decade or so.

One of the benefits of entering this new phase of wisdom is that now I’m somehow more able to recognize these moments of neurotic behavior. In myself, in my girlfriends, occasionally even in girls I’ve only just met. It’s eye-opening, really. I’ve learned that we get upset (a lot) over things that have… well… nothing to do with anything. But the thing is, to us, this little thing actually does relate to something. See, men are confused because they take us literally; they believe that the problem at hand is the problem at hand, when really, there’s usually so much more under the surface.

When I get irritated at, or pick a fight over, something completely ridiculous, I can almost always see that I’m being unreasonable and unfair. The problem, though, is that whatever the underlying issue happens to be, it’s never something that I think is ridiculous.

Men fight over what is in front of them, over what we (women) have laid on the table, but we (women) fight over what is under the table. What we’ve placed on the table is just something we’re using to bring up our real issues. Do you follow?

Women are neurotic, for sure. And we can’t help it. We will always be this way. This is because we all secretly want a man who can read our minds when we’re upset, a man who’s in tune with what makes us happy and what makes us angry or sad, a man who can learn what we want and need and expect. We want men who can give us what we we’re hoping for without us asking for it. We want men who can look at the tiny and ridiculous matters we bring up and naturally see what it is that’s really bothering us beneath each of them. And why do we want men like this? Because we, as women, are always searching for the “grand gesture,” we are constantly looking for signs from the men that they care enough to make efforts to satisfy and take care of us. Because we hope (against all odds and better judgment) that men exist who are capable of deeper thought and who will care enough to always get to the bottom of things. What makes us neurotic is that there aren’t a lot of men out there who are like this.

I blame the discrepancy in expectations on the genders’ respective wiring. We just think differently, and that will probably never change unless we all become genderless automatons.

So what do men want? If a man isn’t neurotic, what is he? Reckless? Insensitive? Oblivious? I don’t think it’s fair to pass those judgments when I don’t really know what they want. Where are they coming from? What kind of women do they want?