Happy Independence Day to America and Americans everywhere! I hope you get to see some fireworks today, if you like that sort of thing.
I do, but somehow I managed to move myself into the middle of the only no-fireworks zone in all of Western America. (See below.) In this state, apparently "novelty items" do not include sparklers, but do include those annoying little popping things kids throw on the ground to scare the bejeebuz out of adults who weren't looking.
So for the sake of fellow Arizonans -- and those living in Delaware, Massachusetts, New Jersey, New York and Rhode Island -- this will just have to do:
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