Pretty Wild

This show represents all that is wrong with America.

I've watched 10 minutes of it, and it's a trainwreck. Here's a taste of the insanity:



And it gets worse.

Mr. Neiers used to be the director of photography for the show Friends, and Mrs. Neiers used to be an international model. And did I mention that one of the girls, Alexis, may or may not have been involved with the Bling Ring?

This is such a perfect case study in how badly parents can totally screw up their kids. You must watch. At least once. In order to laugh. And then to say, "Man. I sure am glad I'm not as messed up as those people." Unless you are. In which case maybe you can explain to me in what world it's OK for a little girl to have a pole-dancing party for her 16th birthday.

I'm An Independent Diva / But I Still Kinda Need Ya

Have you been watching The Office webisodes online? Here's one of my favorites.

It's one episode divided into three parts, but you must at least watch the third one, as it's the music video and the other two just explain how the characters got to that point.

I've had this silly song stuck in my head for four days now, and I just have to share it with someone.

The Perfect Hat Will Cover Her Face

My job just kicked my fanny.

I just worked from 9 a.m. Friday morning straight through to 5:30 a.m. Saturday morning. Think about that for a minute.

Anyway, once again, the magazines will be on racks come Monday, and people had better like them.

My mind is still abnormally fuzzy after so many sleep-deprived hours. For a long stretch of time yesterday I didn't even have the strength to do anything but sleep or click buttons on the TV remote.

This explains why I watched one hockey game, the NASCAR Richmond Sweep, and all of the Kentucky Derby, including pre- and post-show. While it was fun to see all the horses and horse enthusiasts who were excited to be at Churchhill Downs, it was terribly sad to see Access Hollywood's Nancy O'Dell interviewing all the "celebrities" -- who don't even have names outside the industry -- walk down the Kentucky Derby "red carpet." Who are these people? And how is society better for having been made to watch a video of Paris Hilton searching for the "perfect Kentucky Derby hat"?

What I Did On New Year's Eve

I asked for season one of The Office on DVD for Christmas, and my parents were kind enough to present me with it. That was a week and a half ago.

Since then, my boyfriend and I have bought seasons two, three and four, and been consuming episodes at an average rate of eight per day. Are we ashamed? No. We're on holiday. To hell with productivity.

It shouldn't really come as a surprise, then, that come New Year's Eve, we were feeling more like homebodies than partygoers.

I'm not entirely sure where the idea came from (actually, yes I am), but... in an effort to not end up feeling totally lazy, we somehow ended up buying perler beads and boards from Michael's, staying in, watching a LOT of The Office and making these, which shall be magnets:

Four are Nintendo-related, and the other two were because we just couldn't stop. And you can bet there'll be more. Just as soon as we get our hands on more black perler beads.

Now if you'll excuse me, Dunder Mifflin calls.

Photo by Sway Sovay

Zack + Kelly 4 Ever

I almost didn't work out this morning because when I turned on the TV an episode of Saved by the Bell was on.

Whatever, don't deny it. You watched it, too, back in the day. In fact, you think you're over it, but you're not. I bet you're running to YouTube right now to watch more clips. Like this one. Or this one. Or maybe even this one.

Not News

Why oh why oh why oh why do local news stations keep reporting on reality TV shows? Unless someone has died or someone or something on the show has crossed legal lines, I really don't believe it counts as "news."

There is speculation that sometimes news stations receive pressure from those higher up to name drop, or even somehow feature, the entertainment programs that air on their own channels. Which is pretty twisted when you think about it.

Pipeline Pros and Cons

Yesterday was a little hectic at work. I'm learning that the managing editors for each city's publication tend to make a big push on Fridays to turn everything in to production before the weekend hits. Production = the copy editors (I'm in that group) and the graphic designers. This is a little frustrating, because it means that they get to return to clean desks on Monday morning, while we (the "clean-up crew," we call ourselves) return to a mass of text and image chaos. I would rather be swamped, though, than be bored, so at least this system guarantees that Mondays will never be slow.

Jobs with workloads that rely so heavily on the turnaround rate of the people before you and after you in the pipeline order of things often mean that there will be a busy day and then a slow day, a busy day and then a slow day. For this reason, I have now transferred season three of How I Met Your Mother and season one of The Big Bang Theory onto my iPod.

I love this job.

Animals Are Funny. They Just Are.

Print week definitely made this my current favorite commercial (even though it's old):

In the Category of Shows I Can Never Turn Off:

If you haven't caught an episode of Man vs. Wild yet, then man, do I feel sorry for you. Watching a man (think: ex-member of British special forces) get dropped off in the middle of some the craziest terrain on the face of the planet (think: Everglades, Moab Desert, Iceland, the center of a volcano) and then find his way back to civilization will always be fascinating to most of the population. And maybe what's even crazier is that the same individual would be willing to do it over and over and over again. Take all that footage, chop it up and put it back together again, and you have an entire season of Man vs. Wild. Which, by the way, is infinitely better than Survivorman. Pffffff... what is that about. Nowhere near as good as the real deal.

Well, if you're not going to watch either show, then at least answer me this: Which name sounds more hardcore to you: Les Stroud......... or Bear Grylls?

That's what I thought.

Photo: Bear Grylls makes sunscreen.
©2007 Discovery Communications

Photo: Les Stroud working the fire.
©2005 Survivorman Productions, Inc.